Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Sublime Utopia of Sorts

People come and go from our lives, relationships die and new love blossoms. We all at one point get in a rut; it becomes our comfort zone in a sometimes-hectic world. We push off dreams and objectives until tomorrow, figuring that what we are doing today will help get us to the next best place.
The safety of the known, even if it's not exciting is the same support system that a cushy corporate job provides. Some people find comfort in this life because the pros to having incentives, insurance and 401k allow one to built a family and home by knowing what is on the horizon.
The risk of jumping overboard guarantees you nothing. It only guarantees from that day on your life will never be written on paper. Seemingly endless possibilities and many more doors are opened.
Not much surprises me anymore. I've experienced more in my short existence that sometimes I forget just how young I really am. I can only imagine where my life will take me in the future.
The pieces to a once puzzling existence are ever so quickly coming together. It's a super surreal feeling and for the first time I am excited that I know what is on the horizon. As the days and weeks go by, writing has become my meditative moment of bliss. I can't wait to sit down at the end of a crazy day and just be one with my Mac Book. I go to bed hopeful and happy.
It's been a long, long time in the making. The one-year anniversary of the death of M is fast approaching, yet it feels like a lifetime ago. I'm no longer chained to the past or heartbroken (I never really was, more like stabbed and raped). So much has changed and at the same time so little has. I am still the same person, I go above and beyond for my friends, but I do guard my heart and question peoples true intentions more intensely than I use to. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing. I can add writer to my resume now and eventually author. All this because of an email. Wow! My life is forever altered, thank you so much M and company. I'll send you the first copy, autographed and all.
Have a sublime night everyone!
(By the way, there is a hidden meaning to the word sublime. Ask your husband. Ah, good times. Never did get around to the amateur film. What a shame.)

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