Saturday, June 12, 2010

Cheers!

OMFG! I have the honor of writing our one hundredth blog. I thought I would take a break from my JSR bashing and talk about my daily life for a change. Yes, I do have a life outside of this blog and as you will soon find out it isn't nearly as exciting or dramatic as it once was.
So today I got up at 5:30 in the morning, which is typical of every day of every month of every year of my life right now. I work for myself, I started a business three years ago at the age of twenty-five and thru a lot of hard work, stress, little sleep and a lost love or two, life is good. I work seven days a week, sixteen hours a day and I couldn't be happier. Every couple months I try to take a week off and go away. I haven't had a day off since the winter, which was to attend my Aunt's funeral. But, finally I'm in the home stretch, just a couple weeks away from being first class bound on a jet plane to a sunny beach with a pit stop in the big apple. Since I had to change the trip by a week, I lost my partner in crime J, but D is still all in, so it should be a very interesting and much needed break.
So back to my daily routine, which is far from fascinating these days and I'm perfectly fine with it being drama free. Up at the crack of dawn, early morning deliveries, office work for a bit, then production and before I know it the sun is setting and another day is over. I should be asleep by nine, but I push the limit and typically stay up until midnight, typing away or zoning out surfing the web. Which then gives me about five hours of sleep. Two extra large sugar free red bulls for energy (although I'm starting to think it's more psychological then caffeine), I don't drink coffee, the smell alone makes me nausea. I only consume alcohol on vacation, I don't smoke (I've watched all my relatives die of lung cancer. There's an advertisement why not to smoke. It really does kill you.)
I don't have much of a personal life these days. After the JSR/John drama last year I realized that men complicate not only my personal life, but also my professional life, so I just say no. The last thing I need is to take another personal leave as the result of a broken relationship. I don't socialize locally; I live vicariously though my friends. I hear about such and such getting married or going on a lavish trip, but I've always felt like an old soul. Most people in there twenties are still partying hard, getting married to their starter wife or husband and a permanent college student. Even in high school I was more focused and pretty much already knew what I was going to do. I would read the New York Times during breaks and had three jobs up until the day I graduated. I applied to one college, there was no back up plan, I knew I would get in and sure enough I did. Maybe it's just a feeling, but I'm pretty sure of myself, like I already know the end of the story. Some people think that older people are wiser because they have lived more, but I find that the younger entrepreneurs who succeed are the ones with guts and balls and aren't afraid to take a risk. They can picture the end result and even when others think they are insane in the end they prove the critics wrong.
I grew up in a generous and caring family. We go out of our way to help others and take extra special care of our friends and family. To some it might sound odd, but my dad's first girlfriend, his first love as my Aunt says, the woman he had intended to marry until she went off to Veterinary school for a semester in college and never came back. I think she felt bad and still cared deeply for my father, but knew it wouldn't work out in the long run. She later married another veterinarian and lives in upstate New York with their three kids. Up until I was fifteen she would send me gifts for my birthday and on holidays, along with a picture of her family and a note to my parents. I suppose she was my father's "what if," but when I look at her and her hippie life and my parents and their big city, corner office life I wonder which life he would have preferred.
Is there an unwritten handbook as far as how people typically deal with exes? Perhaps I'm one of the few who is comfortable enough and confident in myself and my partner that I don't have a problem maintaining a friendship with my ex-boyfriends. With the exceptions of three (one is JSR and the other two I lost along the way), I am a great friend with all my exes, which are about a handful. Most are now married with kids, but we still chat occasionally and even hang out when possible. It's funny now looking back and remembering them as goofy bachelors and now seeing them as married parents, yet they haven't lost their spark. Even after nasty break ups and broken hearts it's amazing how some people can forgive and start fresh as friends. Yet, some will forever hold onto the bitter and emotional hatred, but then again that's why they are now an ex.
Kate Harper

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