Saturday, August 14, 2010

Black List

“A competent and self-confident person is incapable of jealousy in anything. Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.” -Robert A. Heinlein

I understand now why some people prefer to go under the radar. Drama while temporarily fun in the end is never wise to create. Some secrets are better left unspoken. Some might say it's bad karma to speak freely and in detail about something that really isn't anything. Is it wrong to be happy and want to share the love with friends and family? It depends whom you consider a part of your inner circle. I've forgotten whom my supposed friends really are, my mistake. They never really were my friends and by throwing my happiness in their faces I was setting myself up for failure. I have set the bar so high it's nearly impossible to live up to. In hindsight I should have kept my mouth shut and not acted like a carelessly naive romantic (yes, really sometimes I too fall for the fairytale fantasy). I'm rusty at the game of love and it's twisted telephone line that reaches further than I wished to know.
But, at the end of day if what you were praising and gushing about still has the same passion then it shouldn't matter what others say. Maybe they are jealous of the fact that we have moved on and blossomed not just professional, but in love. Their lives have not progressed and when I walked into the bar it felt like a time warp. The same people, doing the same jobs, bitching about the same issues and here I was one the rare few to break free from corporate America and succeed. I had fun, but at the end of the night I was so thankful that I didn't have to return.

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