Tuesday, January 17, 2012

You were burglarized?

Apparently my silence and lack of a response meant that I was kidnapped not simply that I'm not that into you! and so the conversation between Tim and my inbox continued with this message today. Mind you I have never spoken to this guy.


I just now realized what must have happened to you--

You must have been burglarized, and the only thing that horrible and wretched thief must have stole was your keyboard. I feel bad now you poor, poor soul... you must have been so traumatized just sitting there staring at my profile on the screen, clicking away futilely and slamming your mouse down in frustration multiple times while cursing the heavens that this had to happen to you today and that there’s no way for you respond to me.

Like I said... luckily for you, I’m an exceptionally perceptive guy. I mean how many other guys would know that is EXACTLY what happened to you with the limited information you gave me :) And since I’m also in the business of solving problems, here’s some solutions to help you get in contact with me:

1. Get some matches, grab 3 garbage cans, and arrange them in a triangle formation to set them all on fire simultaneously. This will create an accurate smoke triangulation signal so I can come over and find you. I'm like a modern-day knight in shining armor.

2. If you don’t have an active match account, you can text me at ***-***-**** so we can continue the conversation... otherwise I'll keep scanning the horizon for your smoke pillar!"


P.S. Have you heard, our online clothing store is finally open for business!
In keeping with our edgy and bold message, and inspired by our love of Miami, www.sharetheloveclothing.com is the sister wild child to Love Bites. Alive with fun and vibrant designs, each piece of Share the Love clothing stands alone, marked by individuality, a colorful appeal and a cheeky sense of humor.

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