Thursday, April 19, 2012

Love Bites

   So, all is quiet in respects to dating, I am still stuck on the one that got away. I'm pretty sure he's going to come back in the next few months after he is done traveling. I am holding out for what once was because I simply can't move on.... and the guys I have met or went on dates with were either one night stand material (not even future booty call worthy) or "just friends" material. And I didn't sleep with either type. 
   I haven't found anyone that I feel connected with, or even want to be connected to. Tonight I went out for a couple hours, by myself. It was interesting, boring, and ridiculous all in the matter of a few hours. I did end up spending the majority of time with a man I met a couple years ago. When I first met him, we kind of hit it off. Then we went on one date, which went okay but it wasn't anything special for me. So throughout the last couple years I have run into him and we've been polite in talking and all but never really hung out. Tonight was different. We laughed a lot, made up lies and hung out with people we don't know and will probably never see again. It was fun.

   After awhile when we were alone, he told me that he's loved me since the day we met. He professed his love to me in front of all these people too. He told me how hard it's been on him, that ever since that first date when I didn't want to kiss him he's loved me more and more. Oh and that I'm the most beautiful woman he's ever known. Dear God!! He's not bad looking or anything, and I know he's very financially well off and I could totally go for it even if it were just for the money.... but damn it I'm smart. Way smarter than that.

  I was honest with him, I am (possibly) stupidly holding on to the past and a man that isn't even in the same state as me and hasn't even been in contact with me since September. When I say it out loud it sure does make me feel stupid. I just can't let it go, the possibility that he may be "the one" I think I'll give it a couple more months. Anyways, back to the man that loves me and isn't afraid to say it... I think he's either one of those truly honest "sensitive" men that expresses their feelings or maybe he's a "pre-stalker" whichever one it is I want nothing to do with it. I suppose he could be both, a little demented since he's known for 2 years that I'm not into him. I feel a bit bad after thinking about it all. It's almost the same situation I'm in, except the man I love I was actually in a relationship with.

Hot Mama